Blurred Images, Vivid Colors
by Misanagi
Summary: Life is a collection of memories, but they too, need to stay alive.


**Blurred Images, Vivid Colors**

**By Misanagi**

Rating: PG

Pairing: 1x4

Warnings: None. Heero POV

Disclaimer: I don't own GW or the characters used in this fic.

Summary: Life is a collection of memories, but they too, need to stay alive.

Archive: Gundanium Line

Feedback: Yes, please.

Notes: This is a prize to Ikomiko who won one of my Lyric Challenges on LJ.

Big thanks to Anne for being such a wonderful beta reader. hugs

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I hate waiting rooms. They will never be anything more than frustrating. Maybe it's the premise that you are going to have to wait there and waiting isn't known to be an amusing activity.

However, I'm forced to admit that this was, by far, the best waiting room I have ever seen. The walls were made of wood, giving the place a familiar feeling instead of the coldness you expect from any corporation. The brown leather sofas and the round large coffee table, covered with different books and magazines, gave the illusion of a living room. There were three paintings hanging on the wall. They weren't landscapes but portraits, nude portraits. The paintings were exquisite and I didn't doubt that they were originals too. However, I was sure that they weren't there merely for their esthetic value but for the subtle message they delivered.

Instead of annoying instrumental music or incessant vid babble, the place was filled with soft nature sounds; the wind, raindrops, water running. They were so low that they merged with the artificial scenery, creating a relaxing environment. The secretary's desk was located far enough away so that her constant phone conversations were never heard.

There are four other people waiting with me. An old gentleman; his hands were resting on top of his lap and his eyes were closed. He was wearing a suit, but I could tell that, although it is an expensive one, it had been worn many times. Beside him, but far enough to indicate that they didn't know each other, was a middle aged woman. She was wearing a long skirt and was focusing on a book that rested on her lap. Now and then, she would push her large glasses up the bridge of her nose. The last two were a couple of men. From their conversation, I could tell that they were business associates, probably here for a meeting.

I knew I must have looked different, wearing my worn jeans, a t-shirt, and a plain black coat. My look didn't belong there and maybe, I didn't either.

I waited until the large mahogany doors opened and a group of about ten business looking people exited the room, all the while talking about figures, meetings and numbers. I ignored them. As soon as the last one to exit closed the door behind him, I focused my attention on the secretary.

She dialed something on the panel on her desk and waited. A moment later she started to talk on phone. I couldn't hear what she was saying but I could read her lips. Not ten seconds passed between the moment she said my name and the moment he opened the door of his office and looked at me.

It had been far too long. He had grown up. I tried to remember that it had been three years since I had seen him last but I couldn't help but be amazed by the man standing in front of me. He was taller, and I guess we were about the same height, just like before. Dark gray trousers covered his legs and I would have been surprised if they weren't tailor made. He wore a white shirt, the two first buttons open, letting a glimpse of skin show. Around his neck was a loosely adjusted navy tie. His jaw line was more defined, giving him an older look. A few strands of gold hair fell over his eyes making him seem somehow distant, although that statement couldn't be further from the truth.

I stood up and nodded at him. He smiled from his place at the door. "Heero, please come in." If he had been anyone but Quatre Winner, I would have been amazed at the lack of surprise in his voice. Quatre always had the ability to show his emotions, but also to hide them.

I went to the door, keeping eye contact until I walked inside the office and he was left behind. I didn't smile but that simple gesture reminded me of why I was here. He always had the ability to see eye to eye with me, and even challenge me when he found it necessary.

There was desk in front of the large window that illuminated the room; papers and folders filling it. A gray suit jacket hung neatly on the back of the brown desk chair. The left wall was covered by a bookcase. A big circular table rested in the middle of the room, with twelve seats around it; there were more papers and folders on top of it.

The sound of the door closing made me turn. Quatre was resting his back on the door, his arms crossed and his eyes fixed on me. The mask had dropped and his surprise was now clearly visible. "It has been a long time," I said. "It's nice to see you again, Quatre."

It took him a few moments to speak, a sure sign that he wanted to say the correct words. "Well, Heero, I have to say that of all the things I expected to do today, seeing you again wasn't one of them. However, this is more than a pleasant surprise." He didn't hesitate. He just walked over to me and put his arms around me in a friendly hug. I returned it. My arms circled his waist and for a moment it was perfect, we fitted together.

We pulled apart and he smiled at me. A genuine smile, like the one that I had been thinking about for three years. That's when I realized that, even though memories are a pleasant thing, there is nothing like the moment. Quatre's real smile shadowed the memory, making that memory just a blurred copy of the original.

"Please take a seat, Heero." He gestured to one of the chairs in front of the round table, before taking another chair and pulling it closer to mine. I waited for him to say something but he didn't. He didn't push either, but waited, giving me the time I needed to collect my thoughts. After all, I was the one who had come to see him and the one who had disappeared three years ago.

"I have been postponing this visit for far too long," I confessed. He said nothing. "I've already seen the others. You are the last one."

Quatre nodded. "Duo told me. He called me the moment you walked out the door."

I don't know why that statement took me by surprise. Duo and Quatre had always been close. When I had visited Maxwell, he had spoken about the blond as one talks about a best friend. I resented that a little. They shared something special, something I couldn't be a part of because I had left.

It had been a month since I had visited Duo. He had been the first. After that, I went to Wufei, then Trowa, and finally Quatre. What puzzled me was that Quatre hadn't tried to search for me; he had just waited. "Why?" The word left my lips in a whisper and he answered me before I had time to explain.

"Because I knew that you would eventually come to me."

I blinked. I had forgotten how it felt to be in his presence. Even if I remembered that he had the ability to read me like no one else, I had forgotten how it felt when he did. How his words put me off balance but his gestures kept me upright.

Somehow, with that simple sentence, he gave me back my place. He welcomed me after all this time like nothing had happened. We were able to continue where we had left off; as comrades and friends. Keeping that comfort zone we had always had between us, where there was no need of formalities or games. A space where we could both be ourselves.

For the first time in three years, I smiled. "Leaving was a mistake," I said. My voice was cold, but I knew that didn't bother him.

"It was something you needed to do," he replied. "Did you find the answers you were looking for?"

"No." I hadn't. I went away to find myself. To understand who I really was and what I wanted to be. I disappeared because this was a journey I needed to do alone. I went to so many places and lived so many lives but I couldn't find any answers. The more I searched, the less I found. The only thing constant in my mind was the memories. Fighting, talking, killing, teasing, bloodshed, smiles, hurt, friendship...

"I thought I needed to get away from my memories," I said out loud. "I left everyone related to those memories and, as time passed, I discovered that I was clinging to them. They were the only things that kept me going. I needed to leave the wars behind but not everything else." He understood me; I could see it in his eyes. "I don't want to live on only memories anymore."

His hand settled on top of mine; the colorful smile still illuminating his face. "You don't have to anymore."

Quatre kept his promise. He took me to lunch that day and we spent the afternoon lying on the floor of his living room, sharing our memories of the last three years. I made dinner and he opened a bottle of wine. By midnight we were both drunk. Several empty bottles lay around us and his head was resting on my chest. We became friends again and after time, even more. He gave me new memories, but the most important thing was that he kept them alive and shining with vivid colors.

- The end


End file.
